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In prior articles we have looked at the "Shabbat Observance For The Non-Jew" as well as the "Non-Jew's Preparation For The Sabbath".
We now move on in our study to delve into the various elements contained in the Sabbath observance itself.
The four core ritual elements of a home Shabbat evening (erev Shabbat) celebration are:
There is nothing too hard or too difficult that prevents anyone from remembering and observing the Shabbat if they truly desire to. It is our hope at Bet Emet Ministries that the following makes this easy for everyone. As we study our way through the Shabbat the above 4 steps to observing Shabbat will become perfectly clear and you will be a "pro" before too long.
Friday night rituals vary enormously from one Jewish household to the next. The same can be said for the non-Jew who observes Shabbat in his home as well. In some there are many songs; in others, there is no singing. Some families recite all the blessings in English; others do them in Hebrew. Some people discuss the weekly Torah portion at dinner; other people use the time to reflect on the week past. Some eat earlier than usual in order to attend services; others eat later than usual and linger at the table as the candles burn down and spend the Shabbat at home. Many spend the Shabbat reading, studying and discussing Torah and commentary, Mishnah and Talmud, halakha and responsa and Midrash. This is broaded by the non-Jew as he explores his Jewish Roots of the Christian faith by examining the New Testament through "Jewish Eyes". Many renew themselves by playing board games such as checkers, chess, backgammon, or read their favorite poetry or literature. But above all the Shabbat is a day of prayer and seeking the face of God but not to the exclusion of the renewal of the whole of the person: body, soul, and spirit. This is where the Siddur comes in very handy for the Shabbat. An exciting part of Shabbat is that according to Kabbalah (esoteric Jewish mysticism), lovemaking between husband and wife is encouraged and is a perfect picture of the harmony of Shabbat and the World to come when love and peace is the rule. There is no "right" or "wrong way" to remember and observe the Shabbat as long as you sanctify the time and understand the message of the Shabbat and let is be applied to your life. As you read through this article this will become abundantly clear.
The various elements of Friday night, listed above, are but a selection or a menu from which a personal Shabbat home ritual can be created. As with any menu, all sorts of combinations are possible. Once you find a comfortable way to proceed, it can be very helpful to make a one-page guide to the order and blessings in English, transliterated, and or in Hebrew. This "Shabbat seder" can then be decorated, laminated, and given to guests. We have one available to readers at Bet Emet if you so wish; all you need do is but ask.
Even with fairly detailed explanations, however, Shabbat is not entirely comprehensible solely from the page. The best way to learn it is to live it by watching and participating with others who are experienced at making Shabbat.
The following is but a summary suggestion for the Friday night ritual. You can either adopt and modify for your own needs to make it yours by adopting it as it stands. The following parts of this "Suggested Friday Night Shabbat Ritual" will be explained as we work our way throught them.
"Tzedakah" is the Hebrew word for the acts that we call "charity" in English: giving aid, assistance and money to the poor and needy or to other worthy causes. However, the nature of tzedakah is very different from the idea of charity. The word "charity" suggests benevolence and generosity, a magnanimous act by the wealthy and powerful for the benefit of the poor and needy. The word "tzedakah" is derived from the Hebrew root meaning righteousness, justice or fairness. In Judaism, giving to the poor is not viewed as a generous, magnanimous act; it is simply an act of justice and righteousness, the performance of a duty, giving the poor their due.
Giving to the poor is an obligation in Judaism, a duty that cannot be forsaken even by those who are themselves in need. Some sages have said that tzedakah is the highest of all commandments, equal to all of them combined, and that a person who does not perform tzedakah is equivalent to an idol worshipper. Tzedakah is one of the three acts that gain us forgiveness from our sins. The High Holiday liturgy states that G-d has inscribed a judgment against all who have sinned, but teshuvah (repentance), tefilah (prayer) and tzedakah can reverse the decree.
According to Jewish law, Jewish people are required to give one-tenth of their income to the poor. This is generally interpreted as one-tenth of their net income after payment of taxes. Those who are dependent on public assistance or living on the edge of subsistence may give less; no person should give so much that he would become a public burden.
The obligation to perform tzedakah can be fulfilled by giving money to the poor, to health care institutions, to synagogues or to educational institutions. It can also be fulfilled by supporting your children beyond the age when you are legally required to, or supporting your parents in their old age. The obligation includes giving to both Jews and gentiles; contrary to popular belief, Jews do not just "take care of their own." It is permissible to investigate the legitimacy of a charity before donating to it. We have an obligation to avoid becoming in need of tzedakah. A person should take any work that is available, even if he thinks it is beneath his dignity, to avoid becoming a public charge.
However, if a person is truly in need and has no way to obtain money on his own he should not feel embarrassed to accept tzedakah. No person should feel too proud to take money from others. In fact, it is considered a transgression to refuse tzedakah. One source says that to make yourself suffer by refusing to accept tzedakah is equivalent to shedding your own blood.
Giving money to the poor is associated with nearly all Jewish celebrations and festive occasions including the Shabbat. In moments of great joy, tzedakah is a way of both sharing happiness and of recalling that the world requires our attention. Therefore it is traditional to put aside money for tzedakah on Shabbat before candles are lit. Many families place a special tzedakah box next to the Shabbat candle holders to remind them to perform this mitzvah. Many people cherish childhood associations of Shabbat with little tin cans called pushkes which represented different charitable organizations. Making a collection box by decorating a can or jar, or making a container out of clay or paper is a great project and a wonderful way of introducing children to the concept of tzedakah. In many ways, charitable donation has taken the place of animal sacrifice in Jewish life: giving to charity is an almost instinctive Jewish response to express thanks to G-d, to ask forgiveness from G-d, or to request a favor from G-d. According to Jewish tradition, the spiritual benefit of giving to the poor is so great that a beggar actually does the giver a favor by giving a person the opportunity to perform tzedakah. So in observing Shabbat we remember the world to come where there is no suffering and no needs and we bring an extension of that on Shabbat by giving that others might experience "Heaven on Earth".
Beginning a meal with a song breaks the week's routine and inaugurates Shabbat as a special kind of time. Although almost any song will accomplish this, many Hebrew songs (z'mirot) are associated with the Shabbat table. One of the simplest and best-known is "Shabbat Shalom," whose lyrics consist only of those two words.
But words are not really necessary. According to one tradition, a wordless melody or niggun is itself a prayer, and one of the purest forms of prayer at that. Niggunim (the plural) are usually fairly simple, repetitive, and easily taught.
Let me suggest this website for your Shabbat songs as well as many other beautiful selections:
http://www.hebrewworld.com/BiblicalMusic.html
In all cultures throughout the world, fire is considered one of the basic elements; it is a universal symbol of power, mastery, and divinity. Friday night candle lighting dates back to the first century C.E., and the blessing is as old as the eighth or ninth century.'2 For Jews, the lighting of candles is the act that formally ends the week and begins Shabbat.
Candle lighting is the most evocative of all Jewish rituals. The celebration of the Sabbath begins when one lights the candles, or when one recites the evening service, or at sundown --- whichever occurs first. It is the obligation of the wife to fulfill this religious duty. According to tradition, the mitzvah of lighting candles is assigned to women, though it is incumbent on men in their absence. Whereas some women prefer to reserve this custom to themselves, there is a wide range of practice on this count. In many homes, all women and girls light a pair of candles, though in some families, the honor rotates and includes everyone regardless of gender. Unless a woman had been living alone, she starts to observe it on the first Sabbath after her marriage. Where two or more married women are in the same household, either on a temporary or permanent basis, it is customary for each to light Sabbath candles separately. When the woman of a house is absent or is incapable of performing the ritual, or where a man lives alone, he lights the Sabbath candles himself. Although the woman is given priority in fulfilling this religious duty, lighting Sabbath candles is a requirement related to the general observance of the Sabbath and is a religious duty incumbent upon both men and women. According to Jewish law, candles are lit not at dark but at sunset; technically, no later than 18 -20 minutes before sunset. Among liberal Jews, the common practice is to light candles when the whole household is gathered at the table for dinner.In the absence of a Jewish calendar listing candlelighting time for a particular geographic area, the time of sundown can be found in the daily local newspaper and the candlelighting time determined accordingly. Once the time of sundown passes, the candles may no longer be lit. It is permissible for the candles to be lit somewhat earlier. This is often done in the summer months when the day is particularly long and the Sabbath might be ushered in an hour or so earlier. It is permissible for the candles to be lit somewhat earlier. This is often done in the summer months when the day is particularly long and the Sabbath might be ushered in an hour or so earlier.
The minimum number of candles lighted is two. Therefore at least two candles are lit, symbolizing the great dualities of life: female and male, light and darkness, etc. The rabbis declared that the two candles stand for the two forms of the commandment to "remember"and "observe"Shabbat. Although two is the minimum, there is no maximum.
The two candles symbolically represent the two forms of the fourth commandment:
There are some family or local traditions where three or more candles are lighted or that call for an additional Sabbath candle for every child born. One is free to light more than the minimum if one chooses to do so. White candles intended specifically for the Sabbath eve are generally available. If they are not available, any festive dinner candles of whatever shape, design, or color may be used instead. The only condition is that they be large enough to burn during the Sabbath meal and well into nightfall. Although any candelabra are permissible, it is preferable to have a pair of candlesticks or candelabra reserved specifically for the Sabbath. Although proper ritual procedure requires that the recitation of a blessing always precedes the performance of the mitzvah, in this instance the candles are lighted first and the benediction is recited afterward. The reason is obvious. Recital of the blessing formally ushers in the Sabbath after which it is forbidden to light a flame. As stated the candles are lit before the blessing is recited, either silently or aloud. The procedure is to close one's eyes or cover them with the hands while the benediction is recited. When eyes are opened after the blessing, the sight of the Sabbath lights brings forth the delight that is actually regarded as the culmination of the mitzvah. The blessing recited for the Sabbath candles is:
Blessed are Thou, Lord our God, King of the universe who has sanctified us with His commandments and commanded us to kindle the Sabbath lights.
The Sabbath candles should be lighted on the table where the Sabbath meal is eaten. If this is impractical, it should at least be done in the same room.
There is a custom of circling the candles with hands and arms after lighting them, and then covering the eyes while the blessing is repeated. This practice can feel awkward or artificial to people who have never tried it or seen it done. If these gestures make you feel too self-conscious to get into a Shabbat-like mood, they defeat the purpose. Some people simply take a moment to take and release a very deep breath before lighting candles and reciting the blessing.
Among some Sephardic Jews, candles are lit for family members who have died. If guests are present at candlelighting, they can be invited to light candles for their families as well. A great blaze of candles is very festive.
Candlelighting is a wonderful moment for children. In many families, blowing out the Shabbat match is a special treat. A gift of small candlesticks on a birthday or Hannukah confers a new, more grown-up Jewish status on a child; the first time he or she uses them can be a family event. (Long fireplace matches are a good idea, and fun too.)
The only regulation regarding candlesticks or other ritual objects for Shabbat is the rabbinic principal of hiddur mitzvah, which states that when a physical object is needed to fulfill a commandment, it should be beautiful. Candlesticks handed down from one generation to the next are especially precious, but any object reserved only for Shabbat use quickly becomes a family treasure. Judaica shops tend to offer a large selection of candlesticks, but for something that already has the patina of age and experience, a second-hand store or antique shop may yield an heirloom.
After the candles are lit, it is proper to greet the others in the household with the words "Shabbat Shalom" ("Sabbath peace") or "Gut Shabbes" (Yiddish for "a good Sabbath"). In some families, everyone exchanges kisses.
The Bible records several parental blessings, which are echoed in the custom of blessing children on Friday. There are three traditional blessings: First, the blessing for sons refers to Joseph's sons, Ephraim and Menashe, whose mother, Osenath, was an Egyptian-born noblewoman. The Midrash says that these two were singled out for praise because they held fast to their Jewish identity. Second, the blessing for daughters names the matriarchs: Sarah, whose response to adversity was laughter; Rebecca, the model of hospitality, and Rachel and Leah, who personify sisterhood in the most difficult circumstances.
Some parents add or substitute a more personal message for each child-praise for something that happened during the week, or just a whispered, "I love you."
For boys:
May God make you as Ephraim and Menasheh.
For girls:
Make God make you as Sarah, Rebecca, Rachel and Leah.
Lastly, there is what is known as the priestly blessing.
May the Lord bless you and keep you; May the Lord cause His spirit to shine upon you and be gracious unto you. May the Lord turn His spirit unto you and grant you peace. Numbers 6:24-26
Eshet chayil, "a woman of valor," is the phrase that begins a set of the verses from the book of Proverbs, traditionally recited by husbands to wives on Friday night. Eshet chayil is a long list of praises for a good woman's virtues, including generosity, industry, business acumen, beauty, wisdom, cheerfulness, and loving kindness.
In some households, the tradition of reciting or singing these verses is abbreviated; a husband will simply look into his wife's eyes and say, "eshet chayil," a kind of short-hand acknowledgement of appreciation and love. Often, this traditional gesture is made reciprocal, as each spouse simply takes a moment to kiss and say "I love you." Often the wife will say over her husband:
Any such act makes it very difficult to allow left-over quarrels to compromise the peace and harmony of Shabbat.
The word kiddush comes from the Hebrew kadosh, which means "holy." The term refers to all blessings made over wine, and there is a special kiddush on Friday night. The one-line core of the blessing is always the same, however:
Blessed art Thou, O Lord our God, King of the universe, Creator of the fruit of the vine.
On Friday night, this blessing is sandwiched between two longer passages. The first, from the Torah, recounts the creation of the world.
Gen. 1:31-2:3
31 ¶ And God saw every thing that He had made, and, behold, it was very good. And there was evening and there was morning, the sixth day. 1 ¶ And the heaven and the earth were finished, and all the host of them. 2 And on the seventh day God finished His work which He had made; and He rested on the seventh day from all His work which He had made. 3 And God blessed the seventh day, and hallowed it; because that in it He rested from all His work which God in creating had made.
The second is a blessing that recalls three of the great Shabbat themes: the creation, the exodus from Egypt, and the sanctity of the Sabbath.
There are many customs for saying kiddush. Some families simply do the "boray p'ree hagafen" part of the prayer in unison. Others sing the entire kiddush aloud in Hebrew. In some households, one person reads the longer passages in English and only the core blessing is recited in Hebrew.
In some families, everyone stands for kiddush; elsewhere, everyone sits. Some make the blessing over a single cup, which is then passed or poured into other cups. Elsewhere, everyone drinks from his or her own glass.
It is also traditional to hold the cup in a way that demonstrates that this wine is not simply for drinking or even toasting. According to the Zohar, a medieval book of mystical Bible interpretation, the glass is held in the palm of the right hand with the fingers facing upward and curled around the base to represent a five-petaled rose, an ancient symbol of perfection and of longing for God. Any glass can be used for kiddush, but it is considered preferable to use a special glass or goblet to fulfill the precept of hiddur mitzvah, or beautifying the commandment.
Most people who grew up with a Friday night Shabbat home ritual, associate kiddush with the thick, sweet red wines of Mogen David and Manischewitz. People who choose kosher wine today, however, have a wide selection of drier vintages. Although Jewish law calls for kosher wine, many Jews consider all wines acceptable. Some parents substitute watered wine or grape juice, reserved for Shabbat, for children. A special cup for Shabbat also makes a wonderful present for a much younger child.
Some Jews perform a symbolic hand-washing just prior to saying the blessing over challah, which begins the meal. Hand-washing recalls the purification ceremonies of the ancient Temple, and so the table symbolizes the altar.
Whereas any glass or cup can be used, two-handled cups or layers are made especially for this purpose, some of which bear the accompanying blessing:
The earth is the Lord's and everything in it, the world, and all who live in it; for He founded it upon the seas and established it upon the waters. Who may ascend the hill of the Lord? Who may stand in His holy place? He who has clean hands and a pure heart, who does not lift up his soul to an idol or swear by what is false. (Psalm 24:1-4)
In many languages, the word "bread" is synonymous with "food." A blessing for bread is thus a blessing over food, sustenance, life. Jews make a blessing called motzi ("brings") over challah, a word that comes from a biblical reference to a sacrificial Temple offering of dough. According to tradition, challah is any bread prepared for the purpose of making a motzi, a process that requires breaking off and burning a small piece of dough and reciting a blessing. Today, challah generally refers to a braided egg-rich loaf with a soft, almost cake-like texture. It is available in Jewish bakeries, and happens to be one of the easiest yeast breads to bake at home. Good recipes abound and children love braiding the dough.
Blessed art Thou, O Lord our God, King of the universe, Who brings forth bread from the earth.
It is traditional to have two loaves on the table, recalling the double portion of manna the Israelites gathered on the sixth day, so they would not have to collect food on Shabbat. The double portion of bread also symbolizes bounty. Some families use a small challah roll to symbolize a second loaf. The bread is often covered with an embroidered or woven cloth that, like special challah plates and knives, add to the beauty of the Shabbat table.
There are many customs for saying the blessing. Some hold two loaves together. Some sprinkle the bread with salt, a traditional reminder of tears and of the destruction of the Temple. Because metal is considered a reminder of war, some people keep sharp knives off the table. This is why in some households no knife is put to the challah at all; it is ripped apart by hand instead.
The act of eating the Friday night meal, and all three meals commanded for Shabbat, is considered a mitzvah and a blessing. Just for your information these three meals are called "the Lord's Supper" and it the authentic "Lord's Supper" which is misrepresented in the New Testament. Today Christianity has completely serparated "the Lord's Supper" from its Sabbatical setting and has relegated in the churches to some Sunday "communion" ritual. Lost completely is its Sabbath connection and instead we are taught other "dogmas" that are simply inocrrect.
The idea of anyone going hungry on Shabbat seems terribly contradictory to the spirit of the day, which is why there are so many stories about feeding beggars and bringing strangers home on the Sabbath. Judaism has always been respectful of the fact that basic needs must be satisfied first, and that holiness and hunger are, in some fundamental sense, mutually exclusive. As the Talmud says, "Without food there is no Torah."
Conversation at the Shabbat table is for relaxing, checking in, and catching up. In some families, this idea is formalized. People take turns talking about the important events of the previous week; news, accomplishments, and especially things studied or learned. Conversation about Jewish topics of all sorts is very appropriate: from the weekly Torah portion to the news from Israel. It is said, "If three have eaten at the table and speak words of Torah, it is as if they have eaten from the table of God." Of course other things other than the Torah portion will be discussed but let us remember that our "focus" is God and His Sabbath to which He invites mankind to "sup" with Him.
The birkat hamazon (blessings for food) is a series of blessings and prayers set to a series of wonderful melodies, filled with thanks to and praise for God and full of messianic references. Praying the birkat hamawn is also called benching, the Yiddish word for blessing, and is found in most daily prayerbooks or siddurim. On Shabbat, birkat hamazon begins with Psalm 126:
1 ¶ A Song of Ascents. When the LORD brought back those that returned to Zion, we were like unto them that dream. 2 Then was our mouth filled with laughter, and our tongue with singing; then said they among the nations: 'The LORD hath done great things with these.' 3 The LORD hath done great things with us; we are rejoiced. 4 ¶ Turn our captivity, O LORD, as the streams in the dry land. 6 Though he goeth on his way weeping that beareth the measure of seed, he shall come home with joy, bearing his sheaves.
When the world was created, God made everything a little bit incomplete. Rather than making bread grow right out of the earth, God made wheat grow so that we might bake it into bread. In this way, we could become partners in completing the work of creation.
The following is the first paragraph of birkat hamazon, which is sometimes used as an abbreviated version of the longer blessing.
Holy One of Blessing, Your Presence fills creation, You nourish the world with goodness and sustain it with grace, loving kindness and mercy. You provide food for every living thing because You are merciful. Because of Your great goodness the earth yields its fruit. For Your sake we pray that we shall always have enough to eat, for You sustain and strengthen all that lives and provide food for the life that You created. Holy One of Blessing, You nourish all that lives.
The cycle of Shabbat services begins on Friday evening with Kabbalat Shabbat which is the "welcoming or receiving of the Sabbath". Kabbalat Shabbat was developed by a group of Jewish mystics who lived in Safed, Palestine. Although there are variations on the Friday evening service, virtually all of them contain some version of L'cha Dodi, a poem set to music from that 16th century community. Today, in many congregations when the final stanza is sung, everyone rises to face the door to symbolically welcome to Sabbath bride.
In some congregations, the Friday night service is the biggest and best-attended of the week. In others, the crowds come for Shabbat morning services. Some synagogues include a congregational candle lighting and kiddush on Friday night and some share challah as well. The rabbi, or whoever leads the service, may give a sermon.
Friday night services are often followed by an oneg Shabbat ("joy of the Sabbath"), a communal celebration that encourages touching base with old friends, meeting people, sharing fo od, and enjoying the spirit of the Sabbath.
For those who do not attend Friday night services a synagogue, the evening is spent relaxing at home. After the meal, clean-up tends to be kept to a minimum, although with company and conversation, Shabbat can even transform dishwashing from a chore into a pleasure.
Sitting by the candles to read, or study from a Jewish text (the week's Torah portion is traditional) is considered a mitzvah, especially because the candles are lit not merely for decoration, but for use. Some people take this time to read poetry, listen to music, sit outside and watch the night sky, read special stories to their children, or make "Shabbat Shalom" phone calls. This is your time to "renew" the whole individual; spirit, soul, and body so we are not to be "monks" but children of God who know our Creator desires that we enjoy this time of rest as we see fit. Again the only thing we must remember is to include God in this "special time" which is taken out of the rut of our busy and hectic lives.
The imagery of marriage abounds in Jewish texts; God and the people Israel are like groom and bride and the Torah their ketubah, or marriage contract. Shabbat is often described as a royal bride. The Kabbalists imagined God's unity to have been shattered by the expulsion of humanity from Eden. The feminine side of God, which is called shechinah, would wander the earth in exile until the redemption of the world was complete. On Shabbat, however, God's two halves are reconciled and united in an act of love.
In Yiddish literature of the late 19th and early 20th century, there is a keen sense that on Friday night, husbands and wives look at each other with different eyes. On a purely practical level, the men and women of the shtetl and ghetto looked their best. And the quarrels and conflicts of the week were put aside to abide by the Sabbath's mandate of peace. But another reason for all the smiling was the rather public secret that Friday night was the time for sex. Indeed, Jewish folklore held that erev Shabbat was the most auspicious time for conceiving a child.
Y'did Nefrsh, a traditional song for Friday night, makes the connection between spiritual and physical union quite explicit:
Draw me to You with the breath of love, Swiftly shall I come to stand within your radiance That I may attain that sweetest of all intimacies. My soul aches to receive your love Only by the tenderness of Your light can she be healed Engage my soul that she may taste your ecstasy.
Shabbat Shalom
With the morning, the focus shifts from family to community, from home to synagogue or possibly a home Bible study. I would normally say "church" but few if any Christian Churches remember or keep or observe Shabbat. If they do sadly they are Messianic Churches that adhere to idolatrous dogmas concerning "the Christ" and "Jesus" and worship the Godman. For some, Saturday morning services at a synagogue are a weekly event, whereas others attend only rarely or, on special occasions, such as a bar or bat mitzvah, which means, literally, "son or daughter of the commandment," and is a rite of passage for 13-year-old boys and girls.
For those unfamiliar with Hebrew and synagogue customs, Shabbat morning services can seem dismaying. They were for me at least in the beginning. The best way to explore and enjoy them is to try and relax. No one is there to judge you. No one will know that this is either your first time ever inside a temple or your first time in decades. Some of the most important elements of Shabbat are available for newcomers as well as regulars; the sight of a community of people gathered together, the music and voices, the absence of anything to do, and the opportunity to sit still and simply be. Following in the Hebrew/English Siddur will be difficult at first but not impossilbe over time in fact I bought one in order to familiarize myself with the Siddur (prayer book) used in the synagogue and read it at home until I became more comfortable with its use. Now I have come to love the Siddur (the prayerbook) and cannot part with it as it has become my very good "friend".
On days when we would not go to synagogue then we at Bet Emet would gather for a Bible Study and over time this grew into a full-fledged congregation whereby we evolved into a synagogue for Gentile Godfearers which met on Shabbat. We adopted and adapted the "Pattern of Worship" we saw in the synagogue for the outline of our Shabbat services and these services would last into the early afternoon.
After your visit to the synagogue or your home Bible study (service) then it is time to return home and share your experiences with your family if they did not accompany you. For people who do not wish to or cannot attend Shabbat services, ways to continue Sabbath observance through the morning include reading the Torah portion at home, singing favorite songs from the service, praying on their own, going for a walk, reading spiritual books, meditating, or any other essentially restful, Sabbath-like activity.
The first order of business after services is lunch, the second meal for Shabbat. Traditionally, breakfast does not count as one of the three Sabbath meals. The kiddush over wine at this meal is called "the great kiddush" (kiddush rabbah). According to legend, the fancy name was supposed to compensate for the more impressive Friday night kiddush. The second loaf of challah from the Friday night meal is often eaten at lunch. The "great kiddush" and the blessing for bread (motzi) are often said in the synagogue after services, with everyone gathered around a table of wine (or spirits) and challah. In general, however, most people have lunch at home, which is where they spend the remainder of Shabbat. It is always a mitzvah to invite guests home on Shabbat, especially those who might not otherwise have a warm, friendly place to eat. Encouraging children to invite friends over to eat and play helps make Shabbat special, and gives them the chance to extend their own hospitality. This mid-day meal provided an opportunity for the family to come together to fellowship and share their love and their time with each other.
Although lunch is seldom as elaborate as Friday night's meal, the noon meal is often festive or in some way different from weekday lunches. The whole notion of Shabbat rest discourages fancy cooking in favor of leftovers, casseroles prepared in advance, or a selection of salads and sandwich fixings. But in some families, Saturday means lunch rabbah (the great lunch) because it always features chocolate pudding. Shabbat can be a day of rest from saying "no" to children's insatiable passion for junk food. In some households, Shabbat is reserved for otherwise forbidden treats.
After lunch, the afternoon stretches lazily on. The goal for Shabbat afternoon is to achieve the same level of relaxation one feels on the last afternoon of a two-week vacation: sad to leave but also refreshed. However, because many people find it difficult to face hours of uninterrupted leisure-especially at a time when the rest of the world is busy doing errands and cleaning out the garage-it can be helpful to make specific plans.
Important to remember is that after lunch the time is spend in whatever "renews" you body, soul, and spirit. Traditional Shabbat afternoon activities include napping, visiting the sick, and walking without a particular destination in mind. Some people reserve these hours for activities and pastimes such as bicycle riding, swimming, writing letters, baking cookies, puttering in the garden, reading poetry, sitting still and really listening to music, and going on nature walks. Shabbat is a wonderful time for spouses to talk, and for parents and children to play. And the more an activity is saved only for Shabbat, the more Shabbat-like it becomes. Many might recreate, some might go fishing, some just relax and listen to music or read a good book. Other might just "piddle" around the home with the family and just enjoy the sound of "peace" generated by this time whereby you "slow down" and smell the beauty of "life" which only the Shabbat can create. Some might wash their favorite car or visit with family or neighbors. It is really up to you for you know what brings you "peace" and enlivens you as God's child.
Perhaps the most-time honored Shabbat afternoon activity is Torah study. Some people meet weekly with family members or a group of friends to discuss the week's Torah section, a project that requires no knowledge of Hebrew or academic background in Judaism. The first five books of the Bible have been studied for more than 2,000 years, in part for the sheer pleasure of trying to comprehend its meanings. There are no correct or ultimate answers; there are simply new levels of understanding.
One way to proceed is by reading the week's portion out loud. This not only lifts the activity out of the weekday practice of reading for information, it also means that no one will have failed to do the "homework."
Nor does a Shabbat study circle have to be limited to the Bible. Indeed, the phrase "studying Torah" is traditionally applied to all Jewish learning, which, includes the Hebrew language, a Jewish novel, a book of history or commentary, or even last Sunday's editorial about Israeli politics. The traditional caveat is that sad topics are avoided to preserve the joy of Shabbat.
Especially insightful for we non-Jews is the study into the Jewish Roots of our Christian Faith. Over time you will come to see and value this "Jewishness" and the wisdom contained within the sages of the Israel of God and then these various types of "Jewish Learning" will have a much higher value to you than they might at the present.
According to the Talmud, Shabbat ends when three stars are visible in the sky. On overcast evenings, Shabbat is over when a blue thread is indistinguishable from a white thread held at arm's length. In other words, it should be dark.
Yet, there is almost no limit to how late havdalah can begin. The ritual that ends the Sabbath, havdaIah, (which means "separation" or "division") dates back to Talmudic times. It is a brief, enchanting ceremony that recalls the intimate power of the Friday night home ritual, though far more melancholy because it marks Shabbat's passing. Some congregations hold havdalah services, but this is, by and large, a home celebration. It consists of four blessings: over wine, over fragrant spices, over fire, and over distinctions. I direct you attention to the "Bet Emet Home Havdalah Service" elsewhere on this website.
Shabbat Shalom
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